000000000001 From: vixie@decwrl.dec.com (Paul Vixie) Subject: Language barriers Keywords: smirk, heard it Date: 9 May 89 06:28:15 GMT Sender: funny@looking.UUCP Lines: 20 Approved: funny@looking.on.ca Reply-Path: uunet!aplcen.apl.jhu.edu!news UNDERSTANDING YOUR PAYCHECK: GROSS PAY: $1222.02 INCOME TAX OUTGO TAX STATE TAX INTERSTATE TAX COUNTY TAX 244.40 45.21 61.10 5.89 6.11 CITY TAX RURAL TAX BACK TAX FRONT TAX SIDE TAX 12.22 4.44 1.11 1.16 1.61 UP TAX DOWN TAX KNICKNACK TAX HACKENSAC TAX THUMBTAX 2.22 1.11 1.98 3.93 0.98 CARPET TAX SNACK TAX SURTAX MA'AM TAX PARKING FEE F.I.C.A. T.G.I.F. LIFE INS. HEALTH INS. 10.00 81.88 9.95 5.85 16.23 DISABILITY INS. ABILITY INS. LIABILITY INS. DENTAL INS. MENTAL INS. 2.50 0.25 3.41 4.50 4.33 FUNDAMENTAL INS. COFFEE COFEE CUPS CALENDAR RENTAL FLOOR RENTAL 0.11 6.85 66.51 3.06 16.85 CHAIR RENTAL DESK RENTAL UNION DUES UNION DON'TS CASH ADVANCES 4.32 4.32 5.85 3.77 0.69 CASH RETREATS OVERTIME UNDERTIME EASTERN TIME CENTRAL TIME 121.35 1.26 54.83 9.00 8.00 MOUNTAIN TIME PACIFIC TIME DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME TIME OUT 7.00 6.00 4.44 12.21 OXYGEN WATER ELECTRICITY HEAT AIR CONDITIONING 10.02 16.54 38.23 51.42 46.83 MISC 169.24 TAKE HOME PAY: $0000.02 -- Edited by Brad Templeton. MAIL, yes MAIL your jokes a descriptive "Subject:" line. Not "joke." From werner Wed Oct 26 14:06:34 1988 Flags: 000000000001 From: funny@looking.UUCP (Funny Guy) Subject: "1988 REC.HUMOR.FUNNY Computer Network Humour Annual I often get letters from readers who are stoking up a young lady of Twickenham Who thought that Bush and Michael Dukakis were on their lap She unbuttoned their flap, And always had an orgasm with all his creatures. Happening, one day, he came down to the unknown, and to avoid broken circuits is to sanctify ignorance." [Chester Dolan, "Blind Faith"] "The attraction of heaven? Gods and devils were